The best actor .!

I can be given this award in the Oscars.!
I have made it i mean the decision and it seems i am going to marry one guy after 3 months .. before that there will be an engagement the next Sunday . So yesterday me with my cousins and people have hunted for a hall and got it fixed for the coming Sunday ..it seems it is a good day and the total city is booked ... how quickly things change.. To speak the truth i don't know what is happening and go abt things in a silent manner . I act as if it is a matter of fact and have made the choice ....I am not able to some how see the happy faces around me ..i mean i get angry ..what is there to get so excited abt the whole thing ..
I am here ..trying to digest the fact that i should be leaving a good job and search some where ..the company whom people are normally dying to get into i will be just throwing away ..
Life is just a silly struggle and it seems such a waste of energies to plan so much for it.dont do any planning , its a waste.